Dress Code Explained.
As there is a lot of confusion surrounding dress codes, below some guidance is provided, should you need it.
The groom would have loved a strictly black-, or even white-, tie wedding but just like a marriage, life is full of compromises...
In summary; After months and months of covid, this is the time to look your very, very best!
The dress code for the ceremony is therefore: Black Tie Optional - Formal.
This means; you can deviate slightly from the definition for Black Tie but should not look out of place next to someone who arrives in full black tie attire. (Defined below) As pretentious as the rules below sound, the couple would like to refer to the groom's late grandmother's wise saying;
“Only when one fully knows and understands the rules, one is allowed to bend them”.
- E. Geijer
Click here for do's and do'nts
Ok, I get it, but what does OPTIONAL mean and how formal is FORMAL?
Formal means one step down from black tie, but still fully within the parameters of being formal.
Black Tie Optional means that Black tie attire is very highly encurraged, but if you are unable, there are some options.
Women could wear either floor-length gowns, formal pant-suits or slightly shorter cocktail dresses, and your choice of fabric will be a little less limiting. High heels are welcome, but as a lot of the party is on grass, wedges are recommended. (Please scroll to the bottom of the linked page for definitions for women)
Men have the option of wearing a classic dinner suit / tuxedo (Swedish; Smoking), and naturally, the groom does very much encourage this. If this is not at all possible for you, choose a well-fitting darker coloured suit and a formal tie.
You can to a certain extent even deviate with a less strict shirt in preparation for the long night on the dancefloor ahead. Also please remember the old saying "you can always spot a gentleman by the shoes he wears"..
Guideline for both men and women should be to feel glamorous yet comfortable,
without looking the least out of place next to someone in full black tie attire.
Bending the rules?
Since it is considered inappropriate to wear a tuxedo before 5pm, we already broke some rules. To be correct, the dress code should have said “Schakett / Jakett / Morning coat” given the time of day.
As we are quite aware that most people in modern society barely know what a Schakett/Jakett is, let alone own one, we will have to “maak 'n plan”.
The dresscode is therefore Black tie optional - Formal, (defined )
FORMAL DEFINITION OF BLACK-TIE
Black-tie dates back to the mid-19th century when King Edward VII commissioned his friend Henry Poole to make a short jacket absent of tails to wear to formal dinner parties. These jackets were more comfortable than the traditional tailcoats and soon grew in popularity among the wealthy of Europe. Today, black-tie falls between formal and white-tie.
A black-tie dress code gives you a few formal options to choose from compared to white-tie.
Women should wear a formal floor-length gown that does not reveal the ankles at the hem of the dress. Women may also wear elegant pantsuits.
Men must wear a tuxedo. A black bow tie, patent leather shoes and optionally a black vest or cummerbund. The tuxedo is black or midnight blue, as the Duke of Windsor so clearly stated in the 1920’s; “midnight blue is blacker than black in the moonlight.” For summer, and only below latitude 30.0446, a white tuxedo jacket with black tuxedo trousers, is also acceptable. All other colours fall under the definition of a dinner-jacket, and is not formally acceptable wear for a black tie event.
For reference; FORMAL DEFINITION OF WHITE-TIE
This is the most formal attire possible (think: Royal British wedding or White House state dinner).
Women should wear a formal floor-length evening gown, no exceptions. Pair your dress with jewelry, heels, and an elegant clutch.
Men are required to wear a tuxedo with tails, a formal white shirt, white waistcoat and bow tie, white or gray gloves, and formal footwear, preferably patent leather court shoes, or alternatively highly polished oxfords.
The Groom's personal choices for black tie
In order of dressing, preferably while enjoying an extremely well chilled Gin&Tonic
- White Briefs (boxers) with a wide waistband.
- Black, very thin, knee high, ribbed silk socks, Alt. black or very dark gray/blue.
- White Shirt - Thin tux shirt with pleated chest, double cuffed.
- Alt. Poplin with piqué details (chest, collar, double cuff)
- Alt. Double cuffed dress shirt.
- All collars cut away, marginally larger collar than office standard. (Never tail-coat shirt or button down)
- Optional; Studs - 2 or 3, Never black (except for funerals).
- Trousers - High waisted silk striped, pleated tux trousers without hoops or back pockets. Can be slightly shorter than normal. The waist should ideally match the height of the jacket’s single button and be marginally looser in the fit than the average office suit pants.
- Suspenders - wide preferably with button fastening and leather trim. If you are a colourful person, this is one of the extremely few places where it can be appropriate to add an accenturing colour.
- Cufflinks - Individual style, but never black (except for funerals).
- Shoes - See Below for more inspiration
- Patent leather court shoe (Opera-pumps)
- Alt. Black patent oxford.
- Alt. Insanely polished black leather oxford.
- Alt. Velvet Albert- slipper (if informal and ideally indoors)
- Bow-Tie - black, in glossy silk, grosgrain or velvet (obviously never clip-on or any other colour than black)
- Tuxedo Jacket - Midnight blue Pointed lapels or shawl collar in silk, two pockets without lids + breast pocket. If single breasted; One black button (ideally convex with only 2 holes). Lining; black or accenture colour.
- Optional; Black Horseshoe-shaped waistcoat - deep cut front (at least 2 studs visible if worn) with thin lapels, 4 buttons, Full silk back.
- Optional; Pocket watch on chain. (wrist watches are generally never worn with a black tie outfit)
For Swedes, or guests visiting Sweden before the event, I recommend to look here;
https://www.benjaminsthlm.com/
Do's and Don'ts...
If you have read all the way until here, we are sure you have understood everything perfectly, although, here are some obvious pointers for the sake of it, and some inspiration on shoes...
Do:
- Put some effort in. After months and months of covid, this is the time to look your very, very best!
- Do not be afraid to ask. Bridesmaids and Best men can be reached for guidance.
- Bring sunscreen and/or a sun-hat for the ceremony. Limited shade will be provided, and the African sun is no joke!
- Smile. All compromises, personal abbreviations and differences in style are best worn with confidence and joy.
- Choose your footwear with care. Heels on grass require skill and dexterity, and even if late night barefoot dancing is a given, there are options to the stilettos.
Dont:
After reading through above, we really hope below is very superfluous, and we quite frankly will send you home to change if you miss any of below, but better safe than sorry..
- Shorts
- Jeans
- Nightclub attire
- Slopps or beach wear
- Trainers or sports shoes
Mens Shoes
Below you will find some inspiration for mens shoes. Bear in mind that a decent pair of mens shoes, with proper care, should last over a lifetime. Given this fact, second hand, and auction sites are a virtual goldmine when it comes to shoe-shopping. A second hand pair and a professional clean and polish often get you a very nice pair that will last you forever for a fraction of the price of a new pair!
- Example shoes for Tuxedo;
- Perfect (https://www.bowhillandelliott.co.uk/product/opera-pumps-black-patent-bow/ )
- Very good ( https://row.crockettandjones.com/collections/mens-icons-collection/products/overton-black-patent )
- Good (more versatile) https://row.crockettandjones.com/collections/mens-icons-collection/products/alex-black-calf
- Example for formal suit;
- Very Good ( https://www.loake.com/product/parliament-onyx-black/ )
- Good ( https://www.loake.com/product/trinity-onyx-black/ )
- Good (more versatile) https://www.loake.com/product/fleet-black/
Lastly, not to break format, here is what you want to AVOID AT ALL COST;
https://www.instagram.com/konsultdojan/?hl=en
https://www.kingmagazine.se/bor-nagon-av-dessa-konsulter-hos-dig-hiva-dem-omedelbart/
